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Did you know that hiccups may be a sign that you have the EBOLA VIRUS? (no known cure, 90% fatality rate) Salivating a lot? You might have RABIES. Toes discolored? GANGRENE. Dropping things? Creutzfeldt-Jakob Disease. (don't ask) This amazing volume helps you find the worst possible diagnosis for whatever is bothering you! For instance, let's say you're having vision problems. Well, it might be that you're just tired or hungover. Been there, done that. But if you consult this book, you'll be thrilled to discover you might have LOIASIS! These are worms that wiggle through your body and set up shop in your cornea. (The good news is it's painless. The bad news is that it's often fatal.) If you're a hypochondriac, you can't possibly live without this book. (Come to think of it, you can't live WITH it , either.) And if you're simply curious, it's a fun read chock full of disgusting graphics, charts, and descriptions. So stop guessing and purchase The Complete Manual of Things That Might Kill You. Otherwise, you might die of something you don't even know you have. Think how embarrassing THAT would be!"
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